Go As A River: Love, Loss, And Resilience

Set against the backdrop of the rugged landscape of the American West, Kent Nerburn tells the story of “Go as a River”, where the protagonist, May Banks, experiences a life-altering journey. During the Great Depression, the hardships May faces, including love and loss, shapes her understanding about resilience. Readers will find that the themes of nature and identity intertwine to mirror May’s struggle for self-discovery.

Ever feel like you’re slogging through quicksand instead of cruising down a lazy river? Like life’s thrown you a curveball, and you’re face-planting in the mud? We’ve all been there – that feeling of being utterly, hopelessly stuck. Maybe it’s a dead-end job, a relationship that’s run its course, or just the general sense that you’re not where you’re supposed to be.

But what if I told you there’s a better way? What if you could learn to navigate life’s ups and downs with the grace and power of a river?

Imagine a river. It doesn’t fight the rocks in its path; it flows around them. It doesn’t panic when it encounters a waterfall; it plunges forward, transforming potential disaster into a breathtaking display of nature’s force. It adapts, it persists, and it always, always keeps moving. That’s the essence of the “river within” – the ability to flow through life with adaptability and resilience.

Over the course of this post, we’ll dive deep (pun intended!) into the core principles that will help you tap into your inner river. We’re talking:

• The unstoppable force of Change & Impermanence.
• The art of Adaptability.
• The blissful state of Flow.
• The unwavering power of Persistence.
• The bounce-back magic of Resilience.
• The importance of Direction & Purpose.
• The renewing rhythm of Cycles & Renewal.

So, are you ready to ditch the quicksand and embrace the river within? Are you ready to navigate life with greater ease, purpose, and maybe even a little bit of fun? If so, let’s dive in!

The Unstoppable Force of Change: Embracing Impermanence

Life, man, it’s like a cosmic washing machine, isn’t it? Just when you think you’ve got a handle on things, WHAM, another cycle starts. And let’s be honest, sometimes those cycles feel more like a rinse-and-spin of pure chaos. But here’s the thing: change isn’t just some annoying side effect of existence; it’s the whole darn point. As that wise old Greek philosopher Heraclitus put it, “The only constant is change.” Deep, right?

Think about it. Resisting change is like trying to hold back a river with a teacup. You might manage for a second, but eventually, that water’s gonna overflow and leave you soaking wet and frustrated. Sticking to the familiar might feel safe, but it’s also a surefire recipe for stagnation. Like a pond that never gets fresh water, things get murky, and nothing new can grow.

Real-Life Rollercoasters: Change in Action

We’ve all been there, right? Maybe your company decides to overhaul its entire system (again!), leaving you scrambling to learn new software while simultaneously trying to meet your deadlines. Or perhaps a relationship takes an unexpected turn, forcing you to redefine your understanding of love and commitment. And who can forget the constant barrage of technological advancements? One minute you’re rocking the latest smartphone, the next it’s obsolete, and your nephew is laughing at you for not knowing how to use TikTok.

These changes, big or small, can feel overwhelming. But instead of resisting the current, what if we learned to surf it? What if we viewed these moments not as setbacks, but as opportunities to level up our lives?

Riding the Wave: Tips for Embracing Change

So, how do we actually do this whole “embracing change” thing? It’s not always easy, but here are a few practical tips to get you started:

• Mindfulness is your mantra: Practice observing change without judgment. Instead of immediately reacting with fear or resistance, take a breath and simply notice what’s happening. Think of it as watching a movie – you’re aware of the drama unfolding, but you’re not in it.

• Reframe the Game: Challenge your perspective! That job loss? Maybe it’s a chance to pursue your true passion. That unexpected move? Could be the start of an exciting new adventure. Every challenge contains the seed of an opportunity, if you’re willing to look for it.

• Flex Your Mind: Cultivate a flexible mindset. Be open to new ideas, new ways of doing things, and new possibilities. Remember, the most resilient trees are the ones that bend in the wind, not the ones that stubbornly stand their ground until they break. Be the bamboo, not the oak!

Adaptability: Navigating Life’s Twists and Turns

Okay, so life throws you a curveball – surprise! It’s kind of its thing. That’s where adaptability struts in, all cool and collected, ready to save the day. Adaptability, in its simplest form, is your superpower. It’s the ability to roll with the punches, to adjust when things go sideways (and trust me, they will!). Think of it as having a built-in GPS that reroutes you when there’s a roadblock, instead of just yelling at the windshield. It’s your capacity to adjust to new conditions, environments, and challenges.

Why is adaptability so darn important? Well, imagine trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. Frustrating, right? Adaptability is what lets you reshape that peg or, even better, find a different, more awesome hole altogether. It hinges on flexibility – being willing to bend without breaking, resourcefulness – figuring out how to make do with what you’ve got, and a willingness to learn – because, let’s face it, nobody knows everything!

Adaptability in Action: Real-World Rockstars

Remember the pandemic? (Yeah, let’s try not to, but bear with me). Think of all the businesses that completely reinvented themselves. Restaurants became grocery stores, gyms started offering online classes, and that one quirky coffee shop started delivering beans via drone (okay, maybe not the drone thing, but you get the idea). These are prime examples of adaptable individuals or companies who didn’t just survive, they thrived. They saw the writing on the wall, shrugged, and said, “Alright, let’s do this differently!”

Staying on Course: Adaptability and Your North Star

But here’s the cool part: adaptability isn’t just about reacting to problems. It’s also about proactively steering yourself toward your goals. Think of it like this: you’re sailing a boat across the ocean (metaphorically, unless you actually are sailing a boat across the ocean, in which case, awesome!). The wind shifts, the waves get choppy – you don’t just give up and drift aimlessly! You adjust your sails, change course slightly, and keep heading towards your destination. Adaptability helps you maintain your direction and purpose. It allows you to adjust your course without losing sight of your goals. Most importantly, it also opens up new pathways and opportunities you may not have considered before. You might even discover a hidden island paradise along the way!

Finding Your Flow State: Riding the Wave of Engagement

Ever get so lost in something you forget to eat, sleep, or even check your phone? (Okay, maybe forgetting your phone is a stretch, but you get the idea!) That, my friend, is the magical Flow State. It’s that sweet spot where you’re totally immersed in an activity, time seems to warp, and you feel like you’re operating at peak performance.

What Exactly is Flow State?

Think of it as being “in the zone,” but with a sprinkle of pixie dust. Flow State is that feeling of being completely absorbed in what you’re doing, like a river effortlessly gliding downstream. It’s a state of deep immersion, energized focus, and downright enjoyment. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, a positive psychologist, described it as a state where your skills perfectly match the challenge at hand. Not too hard that you’re frustrated, not too easy that you’re bored—just right!

Why Bother Chasing the Flow? The Awesome Benefits

So, why should you even care about finding your flow? Well, besides feeling awesome, it comes with some pretty sweet perks:

• Increased productivity and efficiency: When you’re in flow, you’re firing on all cylinders. Distractions fade away, and you get more done in less time. Think of it as unlocking your brain’s turbo boost.
• Enhanced creativity and problem-solving: Ever stare at a problem for hours, only to have the solution pop into your head while you’re in the shower? That’s the power of flow at work! It allows your mind to make connections you wouldn’t normally see.
• Greater sense of satisfaction and fulfillment: Let’s face it, life’s too short to spend it doing things you hate. Flow helps you tap into activities that bring you joy and purpose, making you feel more alive and engaged. It’s like a big ol’ hug for your soul.

How to Actually Find Your Flow: Your Guide to the Zone

Alright, enough talk. How do you actually get into this elusive state of flow? Here are a few tips to get you started:

• Choose activities that match your skill level: This is crucial. If an activity is too difficult, you’ll get frustrated. Too easy, and you’ll get bored. Find that Goldilocks zone where the challenge pushes you, but doesn’t overwhelm you.
• Set clear goals and immediate feedback: Vague goals are the enemy of flow. Know exactly what you’re trying to achieve, and have a way to measure your progress. This could be anything from writing a certain number of words to completing a level in a game.
• Minimize distractions: This one’s a no-brainer. Turn off notifications, find a quiet space, and let everyone know you’re not to be disturbed. Treat your focus like the precious resource it is.
• Practice Mindfulness to stay present: Mindfulness is like the secret weapon of flow. By focusing on the present moment, you can silence the inner critic and fully immerse yourself in the activity.

Mindfulness and Flow: The Dynamic Duo

Think of mindfulness as the training wheels for flow. Being present in the moment is like greasing the wheels, allowing you to slide more easily into that state of deep focus. When you’re mindful, you’re not dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. You’re simply there, fully engaged in what you’re doing right now. This enhances focus and allows you to be fully present.

So, there you have it! With a little practice and the right conditions, you can learn to tap into the power of flow and make every day feel a little more magical. Now go forth and find your flow!

Persistence: The Unyielding Current Towards Your Goals

So, you’ve set your sights on something big, huh? That’s awesome! But let’s be real, the path to success isn’t exactly a walk in the park. It’s more like a hike up a seriously steep mountain with slippery rocks and the occasional grumpy bear. That’s where persistence comes in.

What Exactly is Persistence?

Persistence is that unshakeable determination to keep going, even when you feel like throwing in the towel. It’s the “I’m not giving up!” attitude that gets you through the tough times. It’s the unwavering belief in yourself and your goals, despite all the obstacles life throws your way. Think of it like this: persistence is the engine that keeps your dreams chugging along, even when the tracks are bumpy.

Small Steps, Big Impact

You might be thinking, “Okay, great, I’ll just willpower my way to the top!” But here’s the thing: persistence isn’t about grand gestures or heroic efforts. It’s about consistently taking small steps, day after day. It’s about doing the little things even when you don’t feel like it. Think of it as compounding interest; those small daily deposits of effort add up to a massive payoff over time.

Examples of Triumphant Perseverance

Need some inspiration? Let’s talk about some real-life examples.

• Thomas Edison: You all know Edison, right? the light bulb guy. But do you know how many times he failed before making the right light bulb. More than 1,000 times. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work” is his famous quote. That’s persistence.
• Colonel Sanders: Before he became the face of finger-lickin’ good chicken, he faced countless rejections. Hundreds. But he kept going, and eventually, his recipe became a global phenomenon.
• J.K. Rowling: Can you imagine the Harry Potter world not being a thing? Rowling’s first book in the series was rejected by numerous publishers before Bloomsbury took a shot at it.

These stories showcase that success rarely happens overnight. Usually, it’s the result of relentless effort, a refusal to give up, and a whole lot of persistence.

Persistence: Your Compass and Anchor

But persistence isn’t just about grit and determination. It also helps you maintain your direction and purpose. When you’re clear about your goals and committed to achieving them, persistence becomes your compass, guiding you through the inevitable storms. It keeps you on course when the winds are trying to blow you off track. It reinforces your commitment and helps you overcome challenges that might otherwise derail you.

Bouncing Back with Resilience

Of course, even the most persistent among us will face setbacks. That’s where resilience comes in. Think of resilience as your personal shock absorber. It helps you bounce back from disappointments and failures, stronger and wiser than before. Resilience fuels persistence by giving you the strength to get back up, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward.

So, are you ready to embrace the power of persistence? Remember, it’s not about being perfect; it’s about being relentless. Keep striving, keep learning, and keep moving forward, one step at a time. You’ve got this!

Building Resilience: Bouncing Back Stronger Than Before

Life throws curveballs, doesn’t it? Sometimes it feels like you’re constantly dodging, ducking, dipping, diving, and dodging (shoutout to Dodgeball!). That’s where resilience comes in – it’s your superpower for bouncing back from those “oh no!” moments, those little bumps in the road, or even those full-blown tumbles down a hill!

Resilience is the ability to recover quickly from difficulties, setbacks, and adversity. Think of a willow tree in a storm. It bends way over, but it doesn’t break. That’s resilience in action!

Why Coping Mechanisms Are Your Best Friends

Building resilience isn’t about pretending everything is sunshine and rainbows. It’s about having the tools and strategies to navigate the not-so-sunny days. Think of them as your trusty sidekicks! Three crucial ones include:

• Building a Strong Support Network: Having people who have your back, who you can vent to, or who can offer a different perspective is like having a safety net. Don’t be afraid to lean on your friends, family, or even seek out a professional if you need it.

• Practicing Self-Care: This isn’t just about bubble baths (although those are great too!). It’s about taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. That could be anything from getting enough sleep to exercising to spending time doing something you enjoy. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup!

• Developing Problem-Solving Skills: When faced with a challenge, break it down into smaller, manageable pieces. Brainstorm solutions, weigh the pros and cons, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Think of yourself as a detective, solving the mystery of how to overcome the obstacle!

Practical Strategies for Building Super-Resilience

So, how do you actually build this superpower? Here are a few practical strategies to get you started:

• Cultivating a Positive Mindset: This doesn’t mean ignoring the bad stuff, but it does mean focusing on the good, even when it’s hard to see. Practice reframing negative thoughts and looking for the silver linings.

• Practicing Gratitude: Taking time to appreciate the good things in your life, no matter how small, can shift your perspective and boost your mood. Keep a gratitude journal, or simply take a few minutes each day to reflect on what you’re thankful for.

• Learning from Failures: Failure isn’t the opposite of success; it’s a stepping stone! Instead of beating yourself up over mistakes, analyze what went wrong and how you can do better next time. Every “failure” is actually a lesson in disguise.

• Setting Realistic Expectations: Don’t try to be perfect. Set achievable goals and celebrate your progress along the way. Be kind to yourself and remember that everyone makes mistakes.

Direction & Purpose: Charting Your Course Downstream

Alright, picture this: you’re floating down a river, right? But instead of aimlessly drifting, you’ve got a map (maybe a slightly soggy one!) and a compass. That, my friends, is what having direction and purpose in life feels like. It’s not just about existing; it’s about navigating with intention! Think of it as setting your personal GPS to “Awesomeville.”

Why is this so important? Well, without a destination, you’re just kind of…there. A clear direction and purpose gives you that “oomph” – that inner spark that makes you jump out of bed in the morning (or at least hit the snooze button with a little more enthusiasm). It provides meaning and fulfillment, like finally finding the missing puzzle piece. Plus, it acts like a trusty guide, helping you make decisions that actually matter to you and motivating you to face those inevitable life hiccups. Think of it this way: when you know where you’re going, even the detours become part of the adventure!

So, how do we get this “map and compass,” you ask? Let’s break it down:

Finding Your North Star: Unearthing Your Core Values

First things first, you gotta know what makes you tick. What truly matters to you? These are your core values, the bedrock of your direction. Are you all about honesty? Maybe creativity? Or perhaps helping others? Get crystal clear on these. This isn’t some stuffy corporate mission statement exercise; it’s about identifying the things that make your soul sing.

Setting Sail: Goals That Align

Once you know your values, it’s time to set some goals that align with them. If you value creativity, maybe your goal is to write a book or learn to paint. If you’re all about helping others, perhaps volunteering at a local shelter is your jam. The key is to make sure your goals aren’t just things you want, but things that actually resonate with your inner being.

Baby Steps, Big Impact: Breaking It Down

Okay, you’ve got a grand vision. Awesome! Now, don’t get overwhelmed. Break those big goals down into smaller, manageable steps. Think of it like this: you wouldn’t try to eat an entire pizza in one bite, right? (Okay, maybe you would, but it’s not recommended). Small steps make the journey less daunting and give you a sense of accomplishment along the way.

Zen and the Art of Purpose Maintenance: Wisdom from the East

Here’s a little secret: sometimes, the path to purpose isn’t about doing more, but about being more. Philosophies like Zen Buddhism and Taoism offer incredible insights into finding a stable sense of purpose. They emphasize mindfulness, acceptance, and living in harmony with the world around us.

These philosophies teach us to be present in the moment, rather than constantly chasing some future ideal. They also encourage us to detach from outcomes, focusing instead on the process and the journey. This doesn’t mean giving up on your goals, but rather approaching them with a sense of flow and acceptance. Think of it as surfing – you can’t control the wave, but you can learn to ride it with grace and skill. By embracing these principles, you can find a deeper, more enduring sense of purpose that isn’t dependent on external achievements, but rather on your inner state of being.

So, ready to chart your course and find your own “Awesomeville”? Let’s do this!

Cycles & Renewal: Riding the Waves of Life’s Rhythm

Ever noticed how nature isn’t just a straight line from A to B? It’s more like a wild dance of seasons, tides, and even those weird phases your plants go through when you swear they’re plotting against you. Life’s the same! It’s not a relentless march forward; it’s a series of cycles, complete with their own highs, lows, and the occasional unexpected plot twist. Think of it like this: you wouldn’t expect summer to last forever, would you? So why do we often freak out when things aren’t always sunshine and rainbows in our own lives?

The secret? Embracing these cycles. Once you realize that life isn’t a never-ending climb but a rhythmic flow, you start to chill out a bit. You learn that setbacks aren’t the end of the world—they’re just winter prepping the ground for a spectacular spring bloom. It’s about understanding that decline isn’t failure; it’s just a necessary phase before rebirth. It’s a bit like realizing that your phone needs to be charged sometimes.

Letting Go and Leaping Forward

One of the toughest, but most rewarding, parts of understanding cycles is knowing when to let go. Hanging onto things that no longer serve you is like trying to wear shoes that are three sizes too small – painful and utterly pointless. Learning to shed the old – whether it’s a dead-end job, a toxic relationship, or just that sweater you haven’t worn since 2010 – creates space for new and exciting things to flow in. Think of it as decluttering your life’s closet – out with the old, in with the awesome!

Lessons from the School of Hard Knocks (and High Fives)

Past experiences aren’t just memories; they’re a treasure trove of wisdom. Reflecting on both your triumphs and face-palm moments helps you spot patterns, understand your strengths and weaknesses, and make smarter choices moving forward. Did that marketing campaign flop? Cool, now you know what not to do next time. Did you ace that presentation? Awesome, bottle that magic and use it again! Your past is basically a cheat sheet for the future, so don’t be afraid to crack it open and learn from your mistakes (and successes).

Finding Your Zen in the Spin Cycle

Feeling overwhelmed by life’s ups and downs? Meditation can be your secret weapon. Taking even just a few minutes each day to quiet your mind and connect with your inner self can help you become more aware of the natural cycles around you. It’s like hitting the pause button on the chaos and realizing that everything is, well, exactly as it should be. Meditation can help you detach from the drama, accept the present moment, and find a sense of peace amidst the constant flow of life. So, take a deep breath, close your eyes, and remember: this too shall pass. And then something even better will come along.

So, that’s “Go as a River” in a nutshell. Hopefully, this gives you a good starting point whether you’re diving into the book for the first time or just looking to refresh your memory. Happy reading!